I love writing. I have been doing it over fourty years. I love teaching.
I wish I could just write romantic comedies and what's good in the history of mankind. I have chosen to do what could be the most difficult writing in the world; making what we have done and become funny. I really do have to laugh to keep from crying.
I believe in a personal God. That is that God is what we, the individual, needs. Not that there are many Gods. But, that he is powerful enough to personally attend to billions on this planet and possibly trillians in the universes. My God has a sense of humor. He scares the hell out of me and helped me laugh at it today. I remember the day my friends and I hopped onto a speeding freight train. Chicago schools were on strike again, as used to be the case, and we were bored. We heard that some guys had 'hit the freight trains' the night before and we were going to see is there was anything thrown from the freight cars and not been gathered up.
I don't know who suggested we 'hobo' the train that day after we could not find anything alone the tracks. I had done it at least a half dozen times before. The time before that I had ran alone side of the train, grab hold of the laddar and pull myself onto the bottom rung. In the excitement I forgot to climb up above the viadult, the steel frame that extended above the tracks at the overpass. So, I had to hug the laddar and pull myself as close to the car as I could. I was in the fourth grade and did not realize that as thrilling as it was, it was stupid.
On this occasion I did not even worry about trying to climb higher until it was too late. The train was speeding up and by the time I saw the overpass approaching, I could not jump off because the train was rounding a bend with fences, stone walls and utility poles. So I pulled myself as close as I could trying to become one with the car. The last thing I remembered clearly was looking ahead at the cars ahead of me starting to rock back and fourth and one of the cars actually scrapping with viadult, metal to metal. I also remember thinking that I was about to die.
I was just learning about the world and the fact that my being black would effect who and what I could become. I did not thing God would do that to me so he must not exist. I thought I was an athiest until I learned what an agnostic was. I decided I was agnostic because I was just questioning at the point. As I lay down in a space just big enough for me to fall and not be smashed or ground into hamburger meat. God gave us the ability to block out great trama so we don't relive them the same way he gave our body the ability to go numb when it happens. When I first regained consciousness I was already on the ground and the wheel were loudly rumbling past me for what seemed much longer that I knew the train was. The noise was so loud I could not even hear myself screaming as loud as I could, "God, I gotta be dreamin'."
I was in tremendous pain, calling for God and momma, and grateful for the pain because. The pain meant that I was alive and in one piece. I knew God had saved me.
I did want to thank you for changing the subject line of our correspondence. I had thought to change it myself. I remember our first meeting after the ill-fated parade. I could have talked to you the rest of the day. I am a natural born teacher.
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